So I am having a panic attack right now because tomorrow im gonna have this lunch meeting with my fucking boss and my fucking vendor and im gonna have to tell em that hey actually there has been changes in my life recently and i cannot say for sure if in the next coming months i will be able to take on the hire. im gonna have to tell some shitstory like my brother is gonna come here but he has autism so i need to try to take care of him. It’s kinda a real scenario that might happen in the future tbh. So this might backfire. But what the shit, y know?
I also have this thing where I beat myself up so much if I am not able to help a person out. Like, I fail to help people do shit, and because of that, I am shit. fuck.