Not Depressed (well, almost) and my quest to find a pen computer

Lately I haven’t been feeling depression as much as I used to on the daily. I’ve been getting into this quest of finding a good pen display or pen computer, and it’s been taking a lot of my time and interest. And I’ve been very excited about it that I don’t really feel that depressed these days. Which is good.

I started researching these pen tablets/computers and decided I want a pen computer. Mostly because I wanted to be able to bring it anywhere without bringing my laptop in addition to a pen tablet..

I went to best buy yesterday, which is a total of 1.5 hour of walking and a burger from Five Freddy’s Burger. I went today as well to a different best buy, which totaled to 1.5 hour of walking + 15 minute Uber drive, and a Tacobell. The reason I went to those best buys is to check out if they have a wacom I can try out… But I only found the Surface Pros (which I don’t like) and the iPad pro (which is great but I don’t like that fact that it’s an iPad).

So, as you can see I’ve gotten a lot of exercise and a lot of junk food. But at least I got one thing out of the way.. I don’t want a Surface pro.. much less an iPad pro.

So one thing’s for sure is that I want an actual Pen computer.. but the one i want, which is the Wacom MobileStudio, is so expensive.. It’s like $2.5k for i5 256GB and I can’t do an installment plan.. cuz there’s problems with it :/ But maybe i’ll try to find out how I can do an installment plan. Now I’m considering instead a pen display… but it then beats the purpose of why I want this in the first place.. which is so that I can bring it anywhere and draw things in places. If I bought a pen tablet, I’d have to bring my laptop all the time along with it. Which is something that I do not look forward to.

Since it seems that I’ll be getting a long holiday next week due to 4th of July, I’m going to try to purchase one next week and play around with it. I’m so excited >_< I need to calm down before making this $2.5k decision though because I don’t want to be hasty about this.

At least there’s one good thing that comes out of working for this 9-5 job that I don’t really want.. which is I can use the money for something I want.

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Week 10 Monday – My co-worker told me to get a chill pill

I think that no matter where I go, it is quite evident that I always stressed out.

I have this task that I need to get done at work but unfortunately people are going crazy over it, adding new requirements on the go and shit. So I can’t finish it by the deadline that was set. And I am always so crazy about being on time, and I beat myself up if I don’t finish something in time.

To be honest, this task got over the deadline because of something that is out of my control. So I shouldn’t even blame myself for it. My co-worker told me to get a chill pill. And he told me this is something that you get used to after years and years of working like this. So he’s pretty casual about it. Lol, on the other hand I was kinda freaking out.

But well fortunately, I talked to my boss and in the end we came up with a solution that we could get done. And I feel much calmer after that because it’s finally to the point where I understand what I need to do.

Ok. Well that’s all.

Going to have to fight another war tomorrow.


Lubbock, TX – Friends who make you feel lonely.

I just arrived to Lubbock, TX to get my stuff and say goodbye to the people I hang out with here for the last time since I’ll be moving for good to Maryland. Sorry for the run on sentences by the way. I am exhausted and I need to be up by 7:40am.

Why the title? Well, my so-called best friend just reminds me how lonely I really am here. I asked her for a blanket as well as soap and shampoo. I was just going to borrow her bathroom or something so she doesn’t have to do anything. But she decided to make things much more complicated. She decided to get empty bottles and put soap and shampoo there, which takes much more time. And she was asking me why I didn’t just buy soap or shampoo. And when I said I don’t want to waste money, she said “Uhhhhh you know it costs money for me too right? And it costs me study time. Remember that I am still a student unlike you.”

Dude? If you were too busy to help then say that from the very beginning! If you didn’t want to help the person in the first place then why help? For reals 😦 It now just makes me feel so guilty. I could have asked another person who won’t be troubled.

This is only the first night and I already feel very very lonely. I am glad I will be moving away.

I should sleep.